August 2013

Throughout history, many great communicators have mused about how difficult it is for people to effectively communicate — even those who speak the same language! Some scholars cite how subtle differences in age and style can potentially create real challenges in successful communication. Case in point might be the stereotypical communication challenges faced between teenagers and parents, husbands and wives, conservatives and liberals. These same kinds of communication issues appear in the work world, as well.

I was asked to work with a director and one of her high level computer technicians. This technician was responsible for a major account significant to this director. This technician had the ability to accomplish his work successfully, but it seemed he was horrible at communication and customer support. These two areas of deficit were greatly jeopardizing this major account, not to mention putting the tech’s continued employment in question.

The director, the technician and I sat down for a meeting to see what could be done to clarify the communication and customer service issues. The director spoke very clearly about what she expected of the technician when he met with the clients and when he interacted with others (both clients and colleagues). The technician nodded in agreement and said that he understood the gravity of the situation. He said he understood what he was doing wrong and assured his director that he would “improve.” After they were finished discussing the communication and customer service issues, and the detailed procedures the director had clarified for him, I asked the technician what his next steps were going to be to improve his standing with the clients on this major account. He looked at me and said, “I have no idea.” The director looked dumbfounded; her mouth was literally hanging open. She was without words. She believed she had been very clear. She believed the technician had nodded in agreement to all of the well-thought out plans she had presented, yet clearly now he didn’t know what his next steps should be. This was an example of an unsuccessful communication event.

I further asked the technician a series of questions and led him through the necessary steps, in his mind, using his metaphors and word choices. We essentially created his game plan in a manner that he could comprehend. We clarified expectations, created measures of success, and established timeframes. With that now visually and firmly in his mind, he was able to summarize his next steps. The technician left the meeting relieved. Over a reasonable period of time, evidence indicated that this technician had indeed learned some new communication skills and his customer relations had improved accordingly.

At the conclusion of the meeting with the technician, the Director and I spent thirty minutes debriefing. We discussed different learning and management styles. She was amazed how her message which had been so clearly intended and what she thought was so clearly sent, was not the message received or understood. This realization was a profound one for her. She vowed to check for understanding more often and especially when she interacted with this technician. She wanted him to succeed and had never seen the role she had played in the breakdown of communication between them. She saw how, as the person delivering a message, she had the responsibility to be sure the message had been received and understood. In the case of the technician, she needed to reframe her message in terms that made sense to him, ask him to summarize it back to her, and then review his next steps, so both she and he would leave the communication event with the same understanding. Although she had believed herself to be a skilled communicator (and by many measures she was), she learned that in this isolated event, she had needed a new set of communication skills. She foresaw how she could also generalize these new skills with other people and different situations. She had added another strategy to her repertoire of positive communication skills, one that would help her to be a better leader in the future.